Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
how does that bad decision feel?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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