something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
