There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
