i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
