Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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