Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
