I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
