I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
