i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
