Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
