Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
he puts the penis in happiness.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
