Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
