On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Randomize
