Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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