remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
