I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
