Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
