We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
