Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
