Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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