Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
even my farts smell like vagina
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize
