I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Randomize
