you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
My hand turned me down
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
