and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
