He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
