i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I just gargled with NyQuil
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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