the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
