Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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