whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
