My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
