is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
