garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
