Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
