Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
