I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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