Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
