Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
