you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
