just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
the day after is always just damage control
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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