Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Just high enough for therapy.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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