How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I woke up under a house in Key West
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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