Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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