if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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