fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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