they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
