Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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