There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
