ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize
