this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Randomize
