I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
